Money Boys

February 5th, 2010
Photo: AMagill, Flickr

Photo: AMagill, Flickr

My boys are fascinated with money. Just yesterday, one of them asked me if lawyers make a lot, they both love to dream about what they’ll do when we win the lottery, and I’m pretty sure 9-year-old Joey is purposely pulling out teeth to pad his bank account. So when the two of them realized that cash prizes go to the folks who finish first in the 1/2 marathon I’ll be running on February 14, they issued me an assignment: “Mom, you’ve got to win!”

“I just want to finish, not win,” I responded.

“Please, please, please, try to win,” Joey and Danny chanted in tandem.

Here’s the deal: If I finish first in my female age group (35-39), I’ll score $250. Second place gets $150, and third place gets $100. Do I think I can do it? In a word: No. My 10-minute mile just isn’t that competitive, I don’t think. Will I tell my guys this? Nope. I plan to arm them with the fact that I’ll try my very best, that I’ll run like I want to win. I’m sure they’ll see visions of wealth when I tell them this, but what I hope registers in their little-boy brains is that dedication and some good hard work are what really matters.

Money, yea, that would be nice, too.

Boy Stuff

January 29th, 2010

Boy stuff keeps me so busy that I often don’t find the time to write about it. But I want to, and I need to, because one day, these beautiful monsters of mine will be all grown up, and there’s no way I’m going to remember all the cute little stories if I don’t jot them down. Here are a few:

Danny

Danny

Danny, 6 years old, finally lost a tooth on December 30. We were at Busch Gardens, eating lunch, when John tugged it out. It was hanging by a thread, we told Danny, and that’s why it needed to come out. He’d been very patient for weeks, letting that tooth linger in its assigned space. Big bro Joe would have yanked that thing from his own mouth the minute he noticed it jiggling even a tad bit. Not Danny, who is now monitoring another loose one. Yesterday, he came out of school and asked me, “Mom, is this hanging by a thread?” I checked and told him it was not. “Then how many threads does it have?” he said. We talked about threads, and figures of speech, and now we await the loss of pearly white No. 2. I predict it comes out, oh, sometime around mid-February. Joey happened to have a barely wiggly one after school yesterday, too. It was out by 5 PM.

Mom and Joey: Same-size feet

Mom and Joey: Same-size feet

Joey is tall. Really tall. He just turned 9 on January 3, and he’s a half-inch away from measuring 5 feet. He’s almost as tall as his Nanny, his feet are nearly bigger than mine, and the mom of the short boy he guarded during his last basketball game was not at all happy about the pairing. About his height, Joey said recently: “I don’t always like being tall.” I asked him why, and he told me people at school think he has had to repeat a grade. “Has anyone ever told you that?” I asked. “No,” he replied. “But still.” Yea, I gotcha, Joe. And that’s exactly why the kid must pass his FCAT test in March, because if he doesn’t, he must do third grade all over again, and there’s just no way he can actually repeat a grade. That would just look downright silly.

We think Danny has a photographic memory — the kid can recite parts of a nutritional label in a nutty accurate way. Sugar and protein are his favorites. Name a food or drink (mustard, ketchup, ground turkey, milk), and he’ll spit back spot-on numbers. The other day, I told each boy they could pick out a frozen treat at the grocery store. Danny picked Scribblers popsicles (no protein, 6 grams of sugar), and Joey grabbed for a package of Klondikes, which didn’t escape Danny’s glance. “Those are loaded with sugar,” he shouted at his brother. Sure enough — 23 grams of the stuff in each square of chocolate-covered goodness. Joey didn’t care, he picked them anyway, and we’re OK with that. I mean, we don’t eat too much junk at our house, so we figure it’s OK to enjoy an occasional treat.

Somehow, we got to talking a few days ago about behavior (the boys like to report on who was good and bad in school each day), and I told them that everyone has good qualities. No one is entirely bad. That’s when Joey said, “I don’t always do the right thing. But I always try my best.” I don’t think I can really ask for anything more. And that’s what I told him — just before I picked boogers off his bedroom wall.

Stay tuned. More to come.

Boy Smiles

January 13th, 2010

watchme-400jd011310

Photo: One in a Million / [ tumblr ]

I much prefer when my boys make me smile than frown, cry, yell and scream. Sometimes, I have to make a focused effort to ensure my face looks happy, though, and it also takes some pretty heavy-duty work some days to flip-flop my head around so that frustration doesn’t take over. Silence helps, so do candles, hot bubble baths, long runs, kid-free dinners out, and when I’m feeling extravagant, pedicures. But one of my best methods for reversing the ragged moments is reading inspirational quotes. Perfect then that I just found the fantastic site called One in a Million. It’s “a place to come when you really need to smile,” writes 22-year-old Sara, who put this masterpiece together for herself and her mother — her goal was to keep their spirits up in the face of her mom’s incurable cancer, and I’m telling ya: This really is the place to find a smile, and now that I know about this mood-altering spot, you can bet I’ll be visiting, like, all. the. time.

It’s just that good.

See for yourself.

Giveaway – The Skinnygirl Dish: Easy Recipes for Your Naturally Thin Life

January 5th, 2010
skinnygirldish-200jd010410

www.bethenny.com

If you’re a fan of “The Real Housewives of New York City,” then you know Bethenny Frankel. She’s not only a reality TV girl, though — she’s also a celebrity natural food chef, columnist for Health magazine and best-selling author.

First came Bethenny’s book “Naturally Thin,” detailing 10 real-life rules for escaping a lifetime of dieting, and now she’s written “The Skinnygirl Dish: Easy Recipes for Your Naturally Thin Life.” This is where she shares fast, practical and economical healthy recipes, then teaches us how to live without them. How perfect for those of us — like moms of busy little boys — trying to live cleaner lives in less time!

Bethenny also dishes on how we can minimize the “cooking noise” in our lives. Keep reading for some inspirational nuggets — and for the scoop on how to win one of her books.

  • Do you hear yourself saying any of these things: I have no food in this house. I don’t have the slightest idea what to make for dinner. There is nothing to eat! I don’t know how to cook. That’s “cooking noise,” and you can stop it, and you can learn to feed yourself without stressing about it.
  • Food is one of the most powerful tools you have for building a healthy body and a calm mind. Food can make you strong or weak, energized or depleted, skinny or fat. You are what you eat — it’s true.
  • Being naturally thin is a practice — you will never be perfect (no one is), but you can choose a healthy path and keep plugging along on it.
  • Recipes are a bit like kindergarten. You learn some basics (how do Whole Grain Blueberry Pancakes, a Healthier Cobb Salad and Oatmeal Raisin Cookies sound?), then you gain the confidence to branch out on your own. When you know how to cook, you won’t need recipes anymore.

OK, I could go on, but then you wouldn’t need the book, and I really think you should get it. Or you could enter this giveaway for a chance to win a free copy. Details follow:

  • Leave a comment and share why you need this book!
  • Leave your comment no later than 5PM ET on Tuesday, January 12, 2010.
  • You may enter only once.
  • Open to legal residents of the 50 United States, and the District of Columbia, who are 18 and older.
  • One winner will be selected in a random drawing.
  • One winner will receive one copy of “The Skinnygirl Dish: Easy Recipes for Your Naturally Thin Life,” valued at $16.00.
  • Winners will be notified by email, so make sure to check next week to find out if you’ve won!

Want another chance to win? Same giveaway going on at my Breast Cancer blog. Click here and enter again!

Boy Birthday Party #9

January 2nd, 2010
Birthday

9th Birthday Wishes

It started out that we were going to take a small group of kids to the 34th Street Grafitti Wall for Joey’s 9th birthday party. It’s where University of Florida students and others in the Gainesville community go to express themselves by painting all sorts of messages — some happy and inspirational, some simply advertising free beer (hey, it’s a college town, what do you expect?). Here’s a peek at what you might see on a drive-by of this wall that borders the University golf course and is commonly known as the city’s “concrete blog.”

Rumor has it that it’s technically illegal to paint this wall, although I made a call to the local police department and learned that it’s not illegal — it’s just not safe. You see, 34th Street is a crazy busy place, and we’d have to paint at our own risk. So even though Joey desperately wanted to leave his mark on the wall, we just couldn’t justify putting a bunch of kiddos in danger. So we improvised and created our own backyard grafitti wall. John hung three big pieces of wood, painted them all with a dark background color, and today, Joey and his friends and family went to town.

35 Avenue Grafitti Wall

35 Avenue Grafitti Wall

The crew painted their hearts out, and they went home with splattered hair, hands and clothing (smocks only do so much!). Before departing, though, they played a rousing game of Paint the Tail on the Donkey.

Paint the Tail on the Donkey

That's Joey's tail sprouting out of the donkey's neck.

And we did some face painting, and sack races.

Ready, Set, Go!

Ready, Set, Go!

And of course, there were gifts, plus pizza and cake.

Happy Birthday, Joey!

Happy Birthday, Joey!

And because our outdoor party temps were tops at about 55 degrees, a bonfire with s’mores was in order, too. Overall, it was a swinging good time, a perfect celebration for a boy who turns 9 tomorrow (that means another party, just a quiet family one, no paint involved).

Cousin Tori

Swing, Tori, Swing!

Sleepover Boy

December 28th, 2009
Growing-up boy

Joey, pre-sleepover

Surviving Joey’s first sleepover might have been harder for me than making it through his very day of school. Something about the overnight thing was really tough. I mean, I dropped him off last night at a friend’s “Guys Gathering” at 5:00 PM, and I didn’t see my 8-year-old boy again until 10:30 AM today, which means I was totally unable to monitor whatever it was he did for all those hours. I know he ate dinner, went to a movie, gobbled down cake, played on a tire swing — but how did he handle himself, was he happy the whole time, did he feel homesick at all? He reports that it was a blast, and he appears to have no complaints at all. He’d do it again, in fact, and he’d like to host his own party one day. The question is: Can I survive that, too?

DS Boys

December 25th, 2009
Nutty for Nintendo DS

Nutty for Nintendo DS

I’m thinking we might not actually speak to Joey and Danny all day today. Why? Because they each got their very own Nintendo DS, and they are completely plugged in. They are lost, gone, totally tuned out.

All year long, they’ve wanted these gadgets — they’ve been pretty sure they were the only boys in the world without them, actually — and while we went back and forth and at one time even vowed we would definitely. not. buy. them. (because once they get something electronic, it’s nearly impossible for their minds to focus elsewhere), we bit the bullet and bought them. We even plan to let them play their hearts out for a day or so (it is Christmas, after all). Then we’ll set some limits. We won’t tell them that today, though, because, honestly, I don’t even think they are capable of hearing right now.

Merry Christmas, Joey and Danny — and to all you loyal readers, too!

Boy Dreams

December 21st, 2009
www.fordvehicles.com

www.fordvehicles.com

Joey wants a Ford truck. A big one. Specifically, he’s got his eyes on a F350, crew cab, diesel, 4X4, dually, black, with a big silver thing on the front and well-equipped for pulling a pretty large boat. Why? I think it has something to do with the truck (and boat) his uncle got. But Joey doesn’t just want the F150 Uncle Jim has sitting in his driveway. Nope, he’s ramped things way up, ensuring that his prize will cost him an arm and a leg, plus a few other body parts. But that’s OK. He’s 8, and dreaming should be a part of every kid’s world.

www.fordvehicles.com

www.fordvehicles.com

Six-year-old Danny is a dreamer, too. He sees in his future a brand new Mustang GT500. I know where this wish comes from — Dad is a huge Mustang fan. A 1970 was his very first car (bought with his very own money), and together, we had a 1998 GT, which we traded for a mini-van two months before Joey was born (that was a sad day: not the day Joey arrived, the day we said farewell to the car). Thanks to Uncle Jim, we have a Mustang again — the one he sold us to make room for the truck and the boat. It’s also a 1998, and while Danny does love it, he yearns for the Shelby.

We sure hope Joey and Danny can score the wheels they want when they grow up. In the meantime, we keep telling them what it will take to acquire the keys to their dream machines: good grades, good college educations, good jobs, a good amount of savings. Even then, it might be a stretch. But we won’t burst their bubbles just yet. Because who knows, if they have just the right amount of drive for just the right amount of time, they might get exactly what they want. And nothing would make us happier than sitting shotgun with our grown-up guys in their grown-up rides. Well, maybe we’d be pretty happy if they got us a dream car, too. We’ll take anything — except a mini-van.

How to Raise Better Boys (Girls, Too)

December 16th, 2009
Crazy boys, with crazy cousins

Crazy boys, with crazy cousins

Two experts on the TODAY Show recently shared that most parents, when surveyed, say what they want most out of life is to raise healthy kids. And when 6,400 moms and dads were interviewed in one study, the following six practices emerged as key for raising better kids. Embrace each one, and your own offspring will be better behaved and less likely to engage in risky behaviors.

  1. Have dinner with your kids at least five times per week. This is what matters most, not your work, not the stuff you’re buying, but actually sitting down and paying attention to your children. It’s not the food that matters, it’s the connection and strength of the family that comes from dining as a group. If you just can’t make it happen because you’re working two jobs to make ends meet, gather at an off time and have a snack together.
  2. Take your kids to church or synagogue weekly. This will teach them that there’s something bigger out there, and they’ll learn a solid sense of respect.
  3. Check your kids’ homework nightly. Intellectual development is just as import as physical development. The more you monitor, the better.
  4. Demand the truth, and get it. Earn trust by becoming a hands-on and involved parent.
  5. Take kids on vacation for at least a week at at time once per year. Leave your Blackberry at home.
  6. Get your kids involved in team sports, but be careful. Research shows that some sports may increase incidences of drinking, smoking and violent behavior.

Inquiring Boys

December 15th, 2009
Joey, reading an age-appropriate chapter book

Joey, reading an age-appropriate chapter book

If I could take away my kids’ ability to read while in the grocery store, I would. Well, not while we’re shopping — I like that they can read while we’re strolling the aisles (Danny would be lost without a good nutritional label to analyze) — but if I could reverse their powers in the check-out lines, believe me, I’d do it, because what they’re learning from sensational magazine covers is resulting in some heavy-duty discussions I tend to think are better left for future ages.

Not long ago, 8-year-old Joey announced mid-line, “Adam Lambert is gay!” Followed by: “What is gay?”

I told him — right there in line, because he was hungry for an answer — that gay means boys fall in love with boys, and girls fall in love with girls.

“Can boys marry boys?” he asked.

At the time, yes, they could (in California, anyway), so I told him that. He was happy, and I think, mildly informed on a topic we’ll tackle in more detail one day in the future. Right after we talk about sex tapes, maybe.

Today, Joey declared, “Tiger has a sex tape!”

Here we go again.

“What’s that mean?” he inquired.

I told him Tiger has gotten into some trouble, and then I had to pay for my groceries. We continued our conversation in the car.

“What kind of trouble did Tiger get into?” Joey asked.

“Who is Tiger?” asked 6-year-old Danny.

“He’s a famous golfer,” explained big brother.

“But what kind of trouble, mom?” said Joey.

Here’s what I said:

“Tiger is married, and he has two kids, but he also had some girlfriends, and that is not OK. When you’re married to someone, that person must be your only person.” I told Joey that Tiger made some bad choices, and sadly, it is messing up other people’s lives. “That’s why it’s important to make good decisions in your life,” I told both guys.

We went on to talk about whether or not Tiger will get a divorce (I hope he does), and we unraveled the whole mystery of divorce for Danny (it’s when a marriage comes to an end). We also talked about whether it’s legal to do what Tiger did. A little bit of research tells me adultery is, in fact, mostly legal, meaning you won’t get arrested for it or anything, although it can have legal ramifications in property settlement, child custody and other matters. Adultery is just wrong. Really wrong. And that’s what I hope my boys learned from our chit-chat today.

What did I learn? To head straight for the kiddie check-out line next time, no matter how the long line is.

Oh, and Joey never did ask for me to define “sex tape.” Nor did Danny. Thank goodness for small blessings.